I Take Off the Mask

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay Your heart wants to weep But it can’t weep Your eyes want to cry But it can’t shed its tears. And so you listen To songs that weep And you read stories Where the hero cries. Nobody sees And nobody hears When your heart screams And your soul starts to bleed.

Image by Hans Hofer from Pixabay “The Lord said to me, The loss of each soul plunges Me into mortal sadness. You always console Me when you pray for sinners. The prayer most pleasing to Me is prayer for the conversion of sinners. Know, My daughter, that this prayer is always heard and answered.” – Divine Mercy In My Soul, 1397 This entry from St. Faustina’s diary has made me realize many things. It has urged me to reflect very deeply about God’s love for us. We’ve been too familiar with God’s wrath. As sinners, we fear God’s justice. It is His mercy that we must learn about more. Mercy that comes from His Love. After all, God is Love. When I read the above excerpt, it reminded me that even God can be sad, and He can be sad for souls who are lost. This is a mystery. For how could Jesus, who is in heaven, and who is supposed to be in eternal joy even become sad? But when we remember that God is Love, we can also come to realize that love is like that. Love wills for what...

God is eternal good. God is light. God is love. God hates darkness. God hates evil. God grieves for what is bad. God rejoices for what is good. And since God has always existed… And since God was the same from the very beginning… He has since grieved for all who will ever be lost and has rejoiced for all who will ever be found. He is present at all times. He is there in our past, He is with us now, and He will always be where we are. He loves at all times. Love that gives whatever is good. Love that wills for life to exist. Love that gives us dignity and freedom. Love is beautiful and the mystery of love is something we could never fully grasp for all eternity. Why love must give room for suffering and why love must shine in times when it is darkest. Why love must fall so it can rise anew. Why love must be patient. Why love must enter times of danger in order to show its courage. We can never fully understand, though we can somehow see. How love warms us and ...

Image by V??ng Nguy?n from Pixabay I’m the type of person who always wants things to be organized. I make schedules, I plan, and I try to anticipate any needs that may arise in the future. Being unprepared seems to be one of my worst nightmares so I try to do what I can to avoid unexpected outcomes. I really try to do my best and that is why when something still goes wrong, I can’t help but ask, “Wasn’t it enough?” It’s so frustrating whenever you know you’ve done everything you could and you still fail in the end. Sometimes I wish I never prepared at all. There are so many people who hardly plan and do what they’re supposed to be doing but who manage to make things work out for them later on. What’s the use of your effort when your efforts have no matching recompense? This kind of process applies not only in work but also relationships. You can invest so much in a relationship and practically devote everything you’ve got only to hurt the one you love the most. You can try to please pe...

When I was in grade school, I had a best friend who gave me a certificate that testifies to our friendship. And while I’ve won many other certificates and medals for my academic achievements later, that certificate of friendship had a very special place in my heart. It signified that I was dear to someone, that I had a companion who acknowledged me as an important part of her life. When I went to high school, however, things started to change so fast. I wasn’t with my childhood friends, cousins and neighbors anymore. I was with a group of people who have been friends for years. Not to mention that it was my first time attending an exclusive private school. I felt like I didn’t belong. I felt like an outcast. I found it hard to adjust socially since then. Even in my college years, I had no fixed group of friends I could call my own. Later, when I finally found people who became close to me again, I really tried to keep them. I was just grateful that I’ve finally f...

Image by Stefan Keller from Pixabay “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.” – Washington Irving My friend, I know how much you’ve been hurt, and I’ve witnessed how this broken world has disappointed you. I’ve also seen how you tried to be strong through it all. Though it was difficult, and though I could barely imagine your pain, you found the courage to go on. You did not back away from life nor did you surrender your fight. Sometimes, however, I feel that the burden is already too great for you to bear. It is much too painful to keep inside of you. And that is why I feel that every now and then, you must find a safe place for you to rest. Yes, a safe place where you can take off your heavy armor and just feel all the crazy emotions you feel within. My friend, there are times when I think ...

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay I think every person has a story about one’s heart being broken. It need not be from a romantic relationship. But it certainly comes from having one’s longings crushed. What was it that tore your heart into pieces? What was it that made you cry? Was it a friendship that wasn’t able to support you in times when you needed it most? Was it a person you loved who betrayed your sincerity? Was it a dream that seemed so far away no matter how hard you tried to reach it? Most of our hearts are broken. We grieve the present when it’s no longer as fulfilling as the past. We grieve the past the we’ve forever lost. We grieve for the future we could never seem to control. We dream, we strive, and we love. We try with all our might but we fail to succeed each time. We expect the best from people only to have our hopes dashed in the end. When will our longings ever be fulfilled? How could our broken hearts ever be healed? Wherever you may be, and however you...

Image by DanaTentis from Pixabay There will always be that secret part of you, that part that others may never know. Your friends may spend years in your company and not learn about it. Your parents may hardly have a clue. Even your most intimate loved one may have no idea that it exists. But it does. It exists somewhere deep within you. That hidden part that no one sees. Have you ever experienced people suddenly being surprised about you? Once in a while, someone says you’ve changed a lot, and another comments you did something quite unexpected of you. But you weren’t surprised at all. You know that you’ve always been that person capable of doing such a thing. They just didn’t know you’ve got it in you all along. There’s a whole universe within each person that cannot be entirely known by another. And though once in a while, someone may have more glimpses into your inner world, you know that there is so much more that hasn’t been revealed. Sometimes it feels good because it helps you ...

Image by pmsjsj from Pixabay If you have watched Korean romantic dramas, you must be familiar with love triangles. You must also be familiar with the second lead who often offers full support and devotion to the main character but fails to end up with him or with her in the end. Many times, viewers of said dramas feel more attached to this second lead. If this character is a man, many female viewers may even root more for him than for the male lead. They would also feel that it’s unjust for such a man who is quite capable of loving wholeheartedly and unselfishly to end up not getting the girl. Some would argue that it’s because of destiny. Some may think it all boils down to the personal preference of the female lead. She loves the male lead, and she decides to choose him even if he could never prove to be better than the second lead. She loves him even if he has hurt her so much already. Thinking about it, I guess I could agree with the latter reason. Sometimes, we...

Image by Sasin Tipchai from Pixabay Sometimes I can’t help but think that the world doesn’t know what mercy truly means. Though everyone seems to talk about it, I feel as though we often get it wrong. Many people who talk about mercy seem to talk about something they feel they ought to have. They feel that they have been deprived of something, and the merciful thing is to have it back. When we talk that way, we seem to see mercy as something that is rightfully ours. Could it be the we are somehow confused between the ideas of mercy and justice? Is it mercy that we want? Or is it justice? If mercy is something we think we deserve, it is understandable why many of us feel so angry when we don’t get the things we want. We feel indignant. Somebody has taken away what is ours and if we don’t get it back, we feel that we have been deprived of mercy. But if we truly know mercy, maybe we’d know more also what humility means. To be given mercy is to be given a kindness we do not deserve. It ...

Image by Briam Cute from Pixabay The longings of the human heart… Who can fathom it? Who can measure it? Does anybody know its depths? Can anyone say how much of it remains to be satisfied? The longings of the human heart… If only we knew them. Maybe then we’d finally understand each other. Maybe then it would be easier to forgive. The longings of the human heart… For how long must they be hidden? For how long must it hurt whenever they are touched? The longings of the human heart… Only God can reveal them. One day we’d finally meet the only One who knows our pain. Only then could all our longings be fully satisfied.

Image by Briam Cute from Pixabay Let me tell you what sin does. It destroys everything that’s beautiful. It covers sweetness with bitterness. It turns tears of joy into tears of grief. Sin spreads like a virus that stifles and kills. There is no private sin because every sin affects the person and each person can’t help but affect another. Just as your joy warms the heart of another, your wounds hurt those around you. And nothing wounds the soul as much but sin. Sin is the darkness that covers the world. It is the pain that burdens each human heart.

Image by Michael Schwarzenberger from Pixabay Have you ever wondered what it is within you that desires to make another person happy? Where does our urge to do good come from? Whichever part of the world we may be, we can observe how people do things for the benefit of others. We can see it in the way that parents think about what’s best for their children. We can see it in the way friends naturally have that desire to give something good to each other, something that would make the other person smile. We can see it in strangers helping people they have only met. When we come to think of it, this is our human instinct that calls us to love and to find fulfillment in love. It is this love we have that propels us to work for the good of others, to move for their sake, to find words that heal and encourage the other. Why are we happy every time we’re able to help another person? Why do we fill satisfied whenever we make another human being smile? The answer to these questions hold the key...

Image by Dessie_Designs from Pixabay Here I am for you Here I am with you Here I am to see you Here I am to love you. Only three words That says a lot Three little words That mean so much. Here I am I surrender all and give my all, And I shall love you with all the love I have in me.

Image by congerdesign from Pixabay Just this once, write with complete abandon. Write as though you don’t need to earn a living. Write, write and write. Write with all of your heart. Write with everything that you have. Just this once, write without fear. Write as though you have the courage to face anyone who’d ever dare to criticize your work. Write with passion and conviction. Write and say everything you want to say. Just this once, write without limits. Write from another world, a world no one may ever believe in but those who can understand where you’re coming from. Write beyond the expectation of others. Write what you may otherwise consider as insignificant or crazy or too extravagant for you. Just this once, write in darkness. Write without knowing where your writing would be taking you. Write as you face that mysterious door into the unknown. Write with your shadows and with your doubts. Just this once, write with light. Write with such an inspired spirit that others can’t he...

“Every secret of a writer’s soul, every experience of his life, every quality of his mind, is written large in his works.” — Virginia Woolf If I were to be asked again what it is I’d like to do, I’d answer that I still want to write. O, there are so many things I’d like to share, so many things I’d like to write about. People usually say I’m the quiet type of person, and perhaps it’s because they don’t see me talking so much. In reality, I want to say so many things, things I couldn’t all put into words. I can’t say them all. That’s why I write them. I write about feelings and thoughts I wanted to process. I write about hurts that have been healed and dreams that came true. I write about the people and things I care about. I write about my most valuable beliefs. When I write, I want to share something important with others. I want to let them feel the happiness I felt and the peace that I have found. I want my readers to know t...

Image by Cindy Lever from Pixabay Have you ever felt like heaven is just too far to reach? I mean, we hardly expect anyone to go there directly without going to purgatory. Only the saints do that. And we all know how hard their lives have been on earth. They have had many sufferings and they went through terrible pain. About those in purgatory, they won’t escape suffering either. It is said that the suffering in the life after this one, even if not in hell and just in purgatory cannot compare to the greatest suffering on earth. Why is it like that? Why is it so hard to be happy? Sometimes it can even feel as though salvation isn’t free. It doesn’t feel so free when we all have to pay such great a price. And yet, it seems that even all the suffering in the world couldn’t even make us deserve heaven. Only the sacrifice of Jesus Himself, of God Himself can do that. And He was the One who suffered most for our sake. In times like these when I am tempted to despair, I try to remember the ch...

Image by Stefan Keller from Pixabay I think one area where the rest of the world can misunderstand Christianity is in the area of suffering. While some spiritual concepts focus on the escape from suffering, Christianity seems to overemphasize its value. We talk about our need to suffer for those we love and how we should embrace the crosses given to us. We fast and mortify ourselves. We esteem the saints who have suffered most, those who have died terrifying deaths. It can come to a point as though the very purpose of our religion is to make us suffer as greatly as possible. But if that’s the case, why would Jesus Christ even come down from heaven to save us all? If the very purpose of life is to suffer, wouldn’t we suffer most when we’re left alone in our sins until we die and suffer forever in hell? To whom among those who approached Jesus for healing did He say that it would be better for them to remain sick and just suffer instead of being healed? Jesus may have delayed in helping ...

There is a pitfall in being a loving person. When we picture a loving person, we often picture someone who is selfless and self-sacrificing, someone who doesn’t care about what happens to him or to her if it means being able to love other people. We picture a person who has no worries being harmed for as long as one’s beloved is happy. While it is important not to forget that love is unselfish, we should also remember that love does not mean neglecting to take care of oneself. Love is not a cruel thing that enslaves us and punishes us. Love is not something that is unconcerned with what we’d become. While love sees and protects others, it also defends itself. Love knows that in order to take care of one’s beloved, one also has to protect oneself. It isn’t selfish to desire to be strong so you could be of service to those you love. It isn’t selfish to think about the value of your life as you also think about the good of your loved ones. You are not alone in this world. As much as yo...

I once went to a place in Guimaras, a beautiful island in the Philippines. I’ve been to many places, but in that place, there was a different kind of silence…a silence you could almost hear. Perhaps it’s because of the lack of electricity in the area. Perhaps it’s the absence of internet connections. But in that place, silence is more than the absence of sound. It was a kind of silence you can feel, a silence whose presence touches you and changes you. It as that kind that I could never forget. Here is an actual excerpt from my diary: At Himala, Barangay Sibunag, we witnessed a spectacular sunset. (I was glad we captured it on film). I was glad I didn’t miss the silhouette of the tree set apart from the rest, somewhat bowing to the left with branches surrendering to the glaring orange sky. Indeed, the peace of the place, especially upon arriving at Barangay Sebaste was striking. No loud stereos, no television sets?—?just the soft rusting of leaves and the sweet chirping of birds now an...

There is something about the story of Jesus’s encounter with the Samaritan woman at the well that never fails to touch my heart. In many ways, while reading or simply watching a scene about it, I can’t help but imagine that I’m the woman He is talking to. Could you imagine it, too? Jesus, tired from a journey, sat by the well. While He’s there, a Samaritan woman came to draw water from the well. She was just doing her regular chore, and she had no idea that Jesus was there.  Not only was He there, He saw her and talked to her.   He drew her into a conversation that opened her heart.  In one version of the story from the series “The Chosen”, Jesus even said He came all the way to Samaria to meet the woman.  He had been waiting for her and knew her even before she came by the well! And all the while, the woman had no idea why a Jew would talk to her and ask for water.  Why would He?  The woman can’t help but feel suspicious. She was so used to judgment and condemnation that she can’t bel...